There is something we all have in common no matter where we’re from or what we’ve been through: most of us have the desire for power and control over ourselves and our life and circumstances. Perhaps events in your life have you feeling victimized, or maybe your circumstances have left you feeling powerless and helpless. If you feel this way, you are not alone. It is time to take back your power!
Power over our life is a deep need we all have, but some feel they are lacking the power to influence or effect a change over their life. Perhaps you feel powerless from abuse you suffered as a child or as an adult, or perhaps maybe a mental health issue or physical issue has left you feeling powerless over your circumstances. The good news is you DO have power, and you’ve had it all along, you just need to know how to tap into it.
As the great Susan Polis Schutz once said: “This life is yours. Take the power to choose what you want to do and do it well. Take the power to love what you want in life and love it honestly. Take the power to walk in the forest and be a part of nature. Take the power to control your own life. No one else can do it for you. Take the power to make your life happy.”
How do you think you would feel if you had your power back and could influence and control your life? To have power you might feel on top of the world, living up to your potential and health, and knowing not any challenge or obstacle can stop you. Who wouldn’t want to feel such a way?
HOW CAN YOU GET YOUR POWER BACK?
- Know you are not what has happened to you. Life circumstances do not define you; how you react to them does.
- Become an advocate that helps end the stigma of whatever you have been through. It is through helping others that we help ourselves. By using your power to advocate for others, you help defeat your own anxiety, depression, and guilt.
- Use a journal. Write to your abuser, your illness, or whatever obstacle you are facing, and say anything you would want to say in real life. Use your voice to vent anything that makes you feel helpless, victimized, and feel yourself grow tall with power.
- Seek validation from yourself, not others. Don’t wait for someone else’s approval. Listen to YOURSELF, and never doubt your decisions. You are in control of your life. You don’t need to ask for someone else’s permission or affirmation.
- Be honest with yourself. Don’t blame others, and don’t make excuses. Take responsibility for your situation. Perhaps you didn’t create the obstacles that you’re facing, but you still have to acknowledge how you can use your power to overcome them.
- Talk to others, tell your story, and think of ways to respond differently to situations that are unhealthy for you.
- Don’t waste energy on complaining.
- Don’t compare yourself to others. “Comparison is the thief of joy.” ~ Theordore Roosevelt. Appreciate what you have and who you are. Don’t compare. Others may not have it as good as you think.
- Do not be a doormat. Learn to say, “No.” Be willing to walk away from any situation. Remember: BOUNDARIES. If you are in a situation that you don’t like or is making you uncomfortable, there is no shame in leaving an unhealthy situation.
- Realize the blessings you do have. Keep a gratitude journal to make your blessings seem real to you and so you can refer back to them.
WHAT TO DO NOW
This is not an exhaustive list of ways to take back your power, but it is a beginning. I encourage you to pick one and PRACTICE it. Keep working at the behavior, and soon you will see changes in your life you might not have thought possible.
Know you always have a choice. To take back your power means you have to take actions. You must love yourself enough to own the power that belongs to you and not let others sabotage it.
Especially remember you do not have to be a victim of your circumstances. As hard as it might be, take your power back by taking responsiblity. You just might be surprised how good it feels to control your destiny.