I carry it with me


“At least it wasn’t a baby” “At least you didn’t have to give birth”

Yes It was “just a blob” and no I didn’t have to give birth. And of course I can’t even begin to imagine how it would feel to go through that.

But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t absolutely devastated. Why do people feel the need to compare peoples experiences? Like it’s a competition for who is the most upset. Like I have no right to be because, compared to other people, I had it “easy”. Well, let me tell you, it did bloody hurt and it certainly wasn’t easy. That “blob” was my baby. Just like the others before that one. That “blob” had a heartbeat. A heart. A life was growing inside me and It died.

I was teetering on the edge of a cliff and the only thing…

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